Volleyball
Favorite athlete: Erik Shoji
Favorite team: Penn State
Favorite memory competing in sports: Using empty Gatorade bottles to play bowling in the hallways with the CR South volleyball team during a tournament at Pennridge.
Most embarrassing/funniest thing that has happened while competing in sports: Warming up in my Elephant Onesie
Music on my playlist: I have a wide variety of music ranging from Country music such as “More than my Hometown” by Morgan Wallen to “We Don’t Talk About Bruno” from the Disney film “Encanto”
Future plans: Become an airborne infantry soldier in the United States Army
Words to live by: “What doesn’t kill you will only make you stronger” - Friedrich Nietzche
(It’s the quote that's tattooed on my forearm)
One goal before turning 30: Hopefully will be an Army Ranger by then and be married. Have a stable income and a house for my family.
One thing people don’t know about me: I know four Languages, three of which are fluent
By Ed Morrone
The 2006 book The Blind Side — and the subsequent film adaptation three years later starring Sandra Bullock — brought to life the role athletics can have in helping young people overcome extraordinary adversity.
Everybody with a Blind Side story features different circumstances. The subject of the book and movie, Michael Oher, used football as a vehicle to escape a horrible home life ravaged by poverty, drug abuse and parents that were emotionally and physically distant. By the grace of God, Oher is taken in by the Tuohy Family, who provided him with the stable home life he never got to experience himself. With their love and support, Oher made it to the NFL, and even to this day serves as a beacon of hope to those like him.
Rayhan Islam is not Michael Oher. Islam, an 18-year-old senior at North Penn, plays volleyball and likely has no idea who Oher even is. And while their backgrounds and paths have been decidedly different, Islam has also endured generally similar struggles that, at the time, may have seemed impossible to overcome.
Not only has Islam overcome his own challenging past — he is thriving in spite of it. Over the course of the last four years, Islam has become one of the most beloved figures in the North Penn community. There are many reasons for this, but the simplest distillation is that he has become a beacon of light for so many others despite the fact that he has experienced struggles most could never imagine or comprehend.
All of this is building to an incredibly bright future in the United States Army, where Islam is eager to give back to the country that unconditionally accepted him when those closest to him refused to.
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Islam was born in Bangladesh, a country in South Asia that shares borders with India and Myanmar. It is the eighth-most populated nation and one of the most densely packed countries in the entire world. As a result, Islam’s parents emigrated to the United States before his second birthday, chasing their own version of the American dream. For them, this meant arriving in their new home in suburban Philadelphia, building a new life through hard work while maintaining their own Bengali culture and traditions at home.
Islam’s version of the American dream was vastly different than his parents. He instantly was exposed to a world of new possibilities, suddenly having options his parents didn’t understand or support. As he grew, he wished to experience more of what America had to offer; his parents, despite moving to a new country, made their new home feel too much like the old one, driving a wedge between child and adult.
“Coming from an immigrant family, life inside the home and the outside world are very different, drastic ends of the spectrum,” Islam said. “There was always conflict inside my home, because my family had a hard time relating to what I was feeling and experiencing. They grew up in a third-world country and didn’t have as many opportunities as I do now. It got to a point where the conflict was so great that it became toxic and dangerous for me.
“In middle school, they sent me to an all-boys Islamic boarding school in New Jersey. My mental health deteriorated, and I went through a lot of adversity having nobody to support me. My parents were not focused on me; they only focused on work and money, because to them, that’s what the American dream represented.”
It became clear to Islam that he and his parents would never see eye-to-eye. Despite living in the same house, he said he would go weeks or months without seeing them or engaging in any kind of meaningful conversation. They became more strangers than family, and the day he turned 18, Islam packed his bags and left, just like that. Islam figured that he was completely on his own in life.
Until he wasn’t.
After an extremely difficult experience at the Islamic boarding school, Islam ended up back at North Penn as a freshman. It turned out to be the best thing to ever happen to Islam. With his parents uninterested in helping build him a stable, fulfilling home life, Islam decided to go find it on his own. He taught himself how to ride a bike, find a job and do his own taxes. The subsequent results have been astounding, because now Islam is a part of at least a half dozen families within the school community.
Today, Rayhan Islam is everybody’s son and brother at North Penn, and he is giving back parts of himself in extraordinary ways. Most kids his age would’ve been jaded or mentally destroyed by his challenging upbringing, but Islam has somehow turned it into an unconditional positive.
“I was angry for many years of my life as a child,” he said. “What drove me to be strong was I had a thing I wanted so bad that I wasn’t going to let anything stand in my way. My dream is to become an Army Ranger. I’ve been back to Bangladesh, and they don’t have the opportunities we have in this country. I’m thankful to have come to this country and be accepted, and ever since, my goal and path has driven me to become who I am.
“Regardless of whether I didn’t know where my next meal was coming from or where I was going to sleep that night, I always knew the man I wanted to be. If I give up now, then one day in the future I won’t be able to accomplish the dreams I have.”
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Because this is a sports story on the surface, it’s important to recognize the role volleyball has had in all of this. Islam admitted to not even knowing men’s volleyball was a real thing a few years ago, and he only tried out for the North Penn freshman team because one of his friends bet him five dollars that he wouldn’t do it.
“Growing up, I was more into track and contact sports like rugby,” Islam said. “To be completely honest, volleyball was an accident. I’ve always been active and played it in gym class, so I figured it was an easy five bucks, then I would just tell the coach I couldn’t play anymore. Then the coach was a really nice guy who took me under his wing, and I discovered volleyball was more a lifestyle than a sport. Now, I had a volleyball family, and I enjoyed every second of it.”
Technically speaking, Islam was raw and had a lot to learn about the nuances and intricacies of the sport. A self-described perfectionist, he was up for the challenge, devouring how-to videos on YouTube and practicing on his own outside of school. While still a work in progress, Islam said he is proud how far he’s come with his ability to serve the ball.
Volleyball season was wiped out due to the pandemic Islam’s sophomore year, but that was fine considering he had many other activities to keep himself busy (more on this later). Fast forwarding to junior year, Islam found himself on the North Penn jayvee team, which is the first time he encountered Eric Headley, then the jayvee coach and now the leader of the varsity program.
Headley could see right away that Islam would be a long-term project but was struck by how hard the kid was willing to work to improve his rudimentary skills. Above all else, Islam was a sponge, willing to listen and was coachable in terms of fixing his mistakes. He learned the value of a good pass, and in time figured out how to move and find the right spots he needed to be on the court.
As far as Islam’s home life was concerned, Headley heard whispers, but at the time had no real clue of the struggles his new player was going through. Headley talked of another boy on the team who had a challenging life and had grown up in the system, but Islam?
“He never talked about any of it,” Headley said. “One of the boys casually mentioned that Rayhan was staying with him, which confused me, because I only knew about the other boy. As I’m piling on Rayhan at practice, it never dawned on me that this kid didn’t have a home. I got the vibe that he stays with other people and kind of couch surfs. I didn’t know a lot about what was going on, and I still don’t, because he never complains.
“He had a lot of craziness going on in his life, and I’ve always thought that volleyball was good for him. He likes organization and the controlled environment of practice. I didn’t know much about his life, but volleyball seemed like a safe space.”
All of these details were confirmed later by Islam. He lived in the same house as his parents until he was 18, but they may as well have been total strangers. When he was officially an adult, Islam reached a tipping point.
“We lived in the same house, but it didn’t seem like I had parents or they had a child,” he said. “I turned 18, figured I had had enough and one day just packed my bags and left. What Coach said is true: I would stay on a friend’s couch for a couple weeks, then stay with another.”
By this time, Islam was a senior, and while volleyball season wouldn’t start until the spring, he had made enough meaningful contacts at the school for someone to step in and offer to help make his living situation a little more permanent.
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Billy Dooney was a senior captain on North Penn’s varsity volleyball team when Islam was a junior, and one day, came to Islam with a proposition.
“Billy came to me and said, ‘I know what you’re going through, and my family would like to help you out,’” Islam said. “That was in October, and his family has been kind enough to let me stay with them for the duration of my senior year. For the first time, I understood the feeling of what a real family is. I sit down and eat dinner with them, and Billy’s mom helps me with my schoolwork. Billy became my brother, and his family did so much for me.
“Having me move in and become a part of their lives, people were skeptical of that step. But they took it, and I couldn’t be more thankful because they have done so much for me. When I didn’t know what that feeling of having a family was like, they stepped up and showed me that this is what having a loving home is like. It’s the biggest thing I could have ever asked for.”
Now would be the time to mention the other families Islam has gained, and there are many. In addition to his own volleyball exploits, he was the manager for the girls team that plays in the fall and immersed himself into that ecosystem, crediting the experience with helping his own volleyball skills improve.
Perhaps the most impactful family outside of boys volleyball is the North Penn ROTC, which laid the groundwork for his interest in a career in the U.S. Army; Islam is also an anchor for North Penn’s television station that is broadcast in the school as well as the surrounding district; he also makes student announcements, is a part of the school robotics club and even runs the boys volleyball team’s Instagram page. There are likely even more things on his plate, but for now, this gives a sense of how Islam has his hand in almost everything that is happening on campus.
This, of course, was by design. Because he never wanted to be at home, Islam loaded up his bustling social schedule with activity after activity as a means to stay at school as long as possible. On some days, he said, he’d arrive at 5:30 a.m. and not arrive home until 9 at night. It became his safe space.
“Not having an actual family, I wanted to feel like I belonged to as many places as I could,” he said. “I did it so I didn’t have to be at my house and face my parents and answer to them. I’ve always thought of myself as an extrovert who loves to meet new people and friends. I would talk to people who had it worse than me, or others who had it good but were so humble about it.
“Hearing these stories inspired me to help myself and the people around me. Taking care of my friends and my team, making sure they’re okay…I never had that person looking out for me to make sure I was okay. I never had that family connection, so the ones I’ve made are very important to me.”
Islam’s North Penn ROTC family has also had a profound effect on his future path. He’s always known he wanted to join the military, and having been a member of ROTC since freshman year has allowed Islam to meet like-minded students with similar career interests. It’s also afforded him opportunities to give back to the community at large, as Islam has performed 275 hours of volunteer work in the last four years. Not only that, but his instructors have become stand-in father figures, helping teach Islam things like how to tie a tie or properly shine his shoes, things he never got a chance to learn from his own father.
“Every time I walk into a classroom, I’ll see an ROTC person that I know,” he said. “It’s a sense of family that didn’t change or move around the past four years. I love the familiar feeling of family. You learn to respect authority, take leadership and be responsible to yourself and others. They’re always there for me, and if something goes wrong, I know they’ll always have my back after four years together.”
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Islam could carry a lot of resentment and sadness inside of him given his upbringing, which makes his desire to lead others and be a light in their lives even more remarkable. As a kid, he felt his voice was never heard by those around him; now in a leadership position across multiple clubs and teams, he wants to be a voice for the voiceless. Islam knows what it’s like to have nobody and feel all alone in life, a fate he wouldn’t wish on anyone else. So, as a result, he sticks up for those who may not know how to do it themselves yet.
“If I’m in charge of anybody, then I want to make sure their voice is heard,” he said. “I want their feelings and voices to be heard, because I was in that position being around people who didn’t understand or know how to communicate with me. To me, the most important thing is to make sure people are okay, mentally and emotionally. Being a leader is important to me, and I want to make myself available as an older brother figure to talk to people, whether it’s about the volleyball team, school, relationships, family problems. I just want to make sure nobody has that feeling of loss or having nobody to go to, so that everybody feels welcomed and cared for.”
With all of this in mind, Islam’s next life step makes sense, because he was born to lead others despite the fact that he had nobody to lead him through life’s challenges and hardships. It’s a deeply personal mission Islam is on, and it will soon take him beyond North Penn to Fort Benning in Georgia, where he will start his basic training as an airborne infantryman. Islam’s end goal is to become a Green Beret, mainly because that unit’s main charge is to infiltrate countries and help train the local community on how to defend themselves. To become a Green Beret, Islam will ultimately have to complete airborne infantry school, and in the meantime at Fort Benning he will learn how to be a soldier, how to communicate as a leader and how to handle weapons.
“If I learn all of this now, I can be an even bigger asset,” he said.
In addition to English, Islam is also fluent in Bengali and Hindi and is on his way to becoming fluent in Arabic. Being able to speak multiple languages will make him an even bigger asset to the military, and Islam said he ultimately views himself as a jack-of-all-trades, someone who can wear many hats successfully and simultaneously in the army, much like he already does now at North Penn.
It might be hard for some folks to digest his career choice, and Islam understands the skepticism. Why the army when he could go to college? Why airborne infantry when there are likely much safer paths to take? It’s hard to explain to others when they haven’t lived the life Islam has, but given his struggles and the family and community support he found at North Penn, it just fits that the military would become a good outlet for someone who craves structure and stability, two things he never found in his own home.
“People will say that infantry is grunt work and that it sucks,” he said. “To me, just because a job ‘sucks’ doesn’t mean I still can’t enjoy it. And a job only sucks if you make it that way. Go in with a good mindset and no matter what it is, you’ll have a great time. And as far as college goes, I can get an education in the military, which will then pay for college later.”
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Islam doesn’t have much free time given all he’s involved in, but when asked what kind of “normal kid” activities he gets to experience for fun, he laughs. The first thing that comes out of his mouth is serving as a volunteer firefighter in his community, so if it hasn’t become clear that serving others is Islam’s fun, this should hammer that point home. He does have a girlfriend — and a very creative way he is going to ask her to prom that shall remain under wraps here — and said any downtime he gets to experience is spent with her, as well as all the friends who have become his family.
“I just like to enjoy their presence,” Islam said of the people closest to him. “Fun for me is catching up with people I love — just sitting and talking and enjoying being around each other.”
Headley, Islam’s volleyball coach, had no idea a kid from Bangladesh would become such a big part of his own life. He has only known Islam since last year, and it’s clear the player has had a profound impact on the coach.
“It’s unbelievable how much he’s done,” Headley said. “He exemplifies that trust bridge almost immediately just by the way he shakes your hand and smiles. I’m 48 years old, and I just want to make sure I appreciate all the things he does. He is so proud of everything he’s been given in his life. He just has this thing where he’s always in the moment, and I’m jealous of that. He appreciates the moment, conversations with people and he just listens — the type of person people gravitate toward because they want to be around this guy.
“The amount of love he gives, it doesn’t matter who you are. He loves all and is the same way with everybody, and sometimes it takes you aback because this is the way it should be. He helps everybody and does not discriminate. He’s helped me stay open and positive and never assume, and he’s really opened my eyes to his pride of being an American.
“Him being so excited to join the U.S. military is so eye-opening to me. I grew up in Los Angeles in the 80s during the racial riots, then I moved east to Newark, N.J., so I’ve seen a lot, but I’ve never before experienced what Rayhan has taught me. It might take four kids to replace one Rayhan next year. Selfishly, I want to stomp my feet as a coach, because I don’t want to lose him. What he brings, you just can’t measure it. It will take a village to support what he is leaving behind.”
Given everything Islam has been through in his short life, it’s safe to say he and North Penn found each other at just the right moment. Without North Penn, there’s no telling where Islam would be in life; and without him, North Penn would have been a decidedly less interesting and bright place over the last almost four years.
Islam is so beyond thankful, owing this place and its people everything for accepting him with open arms when his own blood family refused to do so.
“It’s such an inclusive community no matter your background or experience,” he said. “I was able to find people who related to me, people with similar interests who are now my friends and family. This place has meant everything to me because it provided me with multiple families when I didn’t even have one. Knowing people are there for you and care about you, that’s a big thing for anyone: having people to rely on.”
And now?
“My own family never asked me about my emotions or feelings,” Islam said. “Now, people ask every day how I’m doing and tell me to have a good day. It shows how much they care, and that means so much given what I came through. It’s a feeling I’ve never found anywhere else, and I’m going to miss all of those people knowing how much they had my back.”
